birthday four-three

I love celebrating my birthday, more than any other occasion throughout the year, but this year the celebrations are delayed. After a week of (yet another) illness I decided to wait until I felt better to even think about birthday. But then my beloved Romanian friends sent me a video link. And because I was still awake and coughing in the wee hours of the morning when they were winding down their March third, I was able to view this awesome thing immediately and it turned my birthday “plan” on its head. Whose mood can’t be changed by penguins dancing beneath Aurora Borealis?!?

 

There will still be a week of birthday celebrations, but I’ve decided to take a tortoise pace and celebrate one small thing on each of the next eight days. I have freebies to redeem and movies to watch and a book to read, as well, but there’s more recuperating to be done too. I’m also hoping to blog more frequently than in past months, just for the sake of posterity.

Let Four-Three Commence!

untold stories of 2011 :: a visit to the State Fair of Texas

Growing up in the Dallas area meant a yearly visit to the State Fair of Texas each fall. As a child I was even privileged to have an annual school holiday and free ticket to attend on “Fair Day.” My parents made sure that their daughters’ tickets did not go to waste, and we had a regular family outing to Fair Park in mid-October each year. I have only a few memories from those childhood days, but I do recall the feelings of thrill, wide-eyed excitement, and some boredom when we were forced to spend far too much time walking through the Creative Arts competition submissions. The few memories I do have involve deep-fried fair foods and loads of vendor booths hawking their latest and greatest products. This was the seventies, so infomercials did not exist and the products were truly enticing to a fair-goer. My parents enjoyed these booths the most, so we spent much of our day in those buildings, listening to sales pitches and enjoying free samples. And each year my folks looked forward to returning to the Fair just to restock some of the items they had previously purchased. Once upon a time, the State Fair of Texas equaled the Home Shopping Network in my eyes. But I loved it all the same.

Schools stopped handing out free tickets by the time I began adolescence, but I did get to return to the Fair a few more times in the following years. I most recall a visit with my best friend Valerie when we were freshmen in high school. This was my first time to tour the grounds “on my own,” and I took advantage of the freedom by spending as much time as possible in the Midway. Though the Fair has permanent rides, my sisters and I were never allowed to ride very many of them because they were generally considered unsafe. They are, in fact, just carnival rides, and a much safer option was just down the highway at Six Flags. But a child wants what a child wants, and when finally I had the freedom to roam the Fair on my own, I wanted to ride the Midway rides. That particular day with Val, spending all of our money on cheap thrill rides and rigged carnival games, has always been my personal measure for a good State Fair adventure. That memory has grown in my mind through the years because it was my last visit before moving out of the region. Our Fair adventures became less frequent after that.

In October of 2011, I was finally able to return. I can’t even recall when last I was there for the State Fair event, though it was within the past decade. But this time I went with my friend Mere and had a similar experience to that day with Valerie: I saw the Fair through different eyes. Several times I found myself surprised at the smallness of the fairgrounds, as they had always seemed so vast before, and I realized also that I had never even visited some of the standard exhibits in years past. Mere had her own agenda for the day, having attended the Fair almost yearly since moving to Dallas, and she introduced me to areas that I’d never given any thought before. Because of her knowledge and research, we were able to walk through the Food building right at free sample time, and we also strolled through the special exhibit celebrating Texas’s 125 year anniversary, which featured artifacts from Texas history. I might have never done either of those things on my own. Likewise, I made Mere join me in the Auto exhibit despite her lack of interest; I’m certain my visit would not have felt complete without walking through and checking out all the bright and shiny new vehicles for 2012. It’s just something my dad always wanted to do, so in my mind it’s become intrinsically linked to the State Fair. Thankfully, both Mere and I agreed on one thing: the food. No visit is complete without a deep-fried Fletcher’s Corn Dog and tart-sweet freshly-squeezed lemonade. I also had to stop for a sausage-on-a-stick before day’s end, though Mere was more partial to deep-fried cookie dough. Regardless of what else happens on a visit to the Texas State Fair, it is simply not complete without partaking in these ridiculous (and delicious) foods.

There is more to do at the Fair than a single day would allow (if you are taking time to really explore, that is), but I had one single purpose on this particular visit. In all the years I’ve been to the Fair I have never taken a ride on the giant ferris wheel. This year I vowed to make that happen, even great cost to my limited funds. We planned the entire day around this one event so that I could be on the ferris wheel as the sun was setting over Dallas. From above the fairgrounds you can see the full expanse of the city, and I was determined to get some photos. Our ride to the top occurred at the exact right moment, allowing for a series of breathtaking photos and an even more thrilling experience. Nothing else could have made this day any better. And the blessing came in being able to share it all with my good friend Mere.

Now, of course, I can’t wait to return again this year. I think I’ll try to save some money and do the Midway this time. Surely those carnival rides are better than they seem, right?

Take a look at my complete State Fair of Texas photo gallery for 2011…

in the spirit of a new year…

It should come as no surprise to most of you that I fell away from blogging in the later months of 2011. This is par for the course in my life. I am notorious for beginning projects and never quite completing them, or at most, waiting until I’m pressed against a deadline before really moving on the tasks. It happened at Christmas again this year and it happened on this blog. It happened in my creative life, and it happened in the area of personal goals. It’s not purposeful, this procrastination of mine, but it has been a habit as long as I can remember. However, lately I’ve really been thinking about it. A lot. And to that end I have chosen One Little Word for 2012 that I hope will help me break this cycle. The revelation of that word will come later in the week. For now, with a new year upon me, I truly want to begin a fresh, new chapter. And that means I need to properly close down 2011. Had I not spent the past 5 days in near-literal hibernation due to persistent throbbing headaches I would have already made these final posts. But I am me and there was no closure. So, in this first week of a new year I aim to shut down the past year. Watch for 11 untold stories to be posted here over the next several days. Eleven stories from 2011. It’s not that I wasn’t busy this past year… just that I failed to take my stories and make them known. And what’s the purpose of gathering stories if not to share them? So I will share them now. And finally complete what I began at this time last year. Thanks for bearing with me! There’s definitely more to come.

 

This photo has nothing to do with this post other than the fact that I’ve kind of felt this way in the past few months. And it’s a funny photo. It was W’s response to FINALLY completing the Christmas afternoon one-at-a-time gift exchange with the extended family. It’s excruciating for him to watch each person open a single gift, in birth order, and then repeat the process around the circle until all gifts are finally opened. Eleven-year-old boys just don’t see the fun, I guess. But it makes a good photo.

Twenty years ago today… (well, twenty-five, actually)

My beloved niece Kiwi begins her senior year of high school today. In the midst of all the talk of it and her excitement of it finally arriving, I realized that this marks the 25th anniversary of my own senior year. Twenty-five years! It had never occurred to me before! But my own experiences of high school are very different from Kiwi’s life.

You may recall my mentioning that the teen years were less than pleasant for me, having moved away from my childhood home between freshman and sophomore years of high school. I was already an awkward and introverted fifteen-year-old by that time, uncomfortable with my physicality and even more uncomfortable with social interactions, so dropping me into a town I’d never before heard of with people who had essentially grown up together since birth was nothing short of devastating. I’d lived in my previous town since second grade, had finally reached a level of acceptance and comfort with a small group of friends whom I adored and who loved me back, and during freshman year I finally began to feel like I belonged and that my high school years were going to be epic. I was crushed, then — shattered, even — when my parents announced my dad’s promotion and subsequent need to move to a town located more than an hour north of Dallas and within only a few miles of the Oklahoma border. Oklahoma! It was the end of civilization for me! And I wanted no part of it.

I’d love to say I adjusted to the change over the course of the next few years, but I never did. I spent my entire adolescence feeling sorry for myself and angry at the state of my life, and by senior year I was thinking only of how I could get out of that town — it never did feel like “home” to me — and how life would certainly be so much better when I was “on my own.” Looking back I can only shake my head and laugh at that miserable young girl. But I also can’t say I’d do anything different. I’m still no better at entering new situations than I was at fifteen, though at least I know how to pretend a bit now. But not in 1986. Back then I was hopeless.

In ’86, as my first day of senior year arrived, I still had no close friends and no big dreams for the future. My niece, on the other hand, is filled with hope and joy. She’s had the benefit, so to speak, of living her entire life in one small country town and going to school with many of the same people every year of her life. She has some of the same friends now that she’s had since elementary school. People have watched her grow up since birth. And in Kiwi’s mind, senior year has always been one of the greatest times of life. She’s wise enough to know that it’s not the ultimate phase of life, of course, but she also knows it could become the stuff of legend. She’s grown up hearing stories of “the glory days” from her own father and friends, who all spent their high school years in the same town she lives in now. Kiwi has never expected her senior year to be anything less than glorious, and to finally arrive is one of her first dream-come-true moments. It’s hard not to get caught up with her in such excitement! Today she will experience a senior caravan to the campus, a senior breakfast before classes, a decorated locker by senior parents (her own mom / my sister), and a class schedule that reflects a bit of ease in academics. During the next few months she will experience the football season as a drill team officer and leader among her peers, and in the spring she will begin to have a series of “lasts” that will be both fun and bittersweet. I felt very few of these things twenty-five years ago. I’m thrilled that Kiwi’s experiences are so much greater and more special than anything I ever even dreamed of having, and I can’t wait to watch her walk through these days. I hope I can help her document them, as well, so her memories are established for years to come.

Congratulations, sweet girl! You are truly awesome and these are most certainly great days!

 
 
 

by popular demand :: another month of LISTOGRAPHY

It’s funny how things work out. I’d been planning to do a month-long series of something this summer and was actually considering something for July, but my thoughts had been pretty scattered lately and I just wasn’t putting any commitment to the task. But it had been lingering on the edges, ya know? And then, out of the blue, just last evening, I received a Facebook wall post from a high school classmate asking me to post a new list! Actually, his words were, “I’m jonesing for some Listography. Please, oh please feed us one of your whimsical little lists…” How do you ignore such a plea?!? You don’t, I tell ya! You just can’t. So, with that little kick in the booty I begin another month of Listography. Just for fun. Just because. And apparently, by popular demand (or something). Thanks for the motivation, Scott! I really needed it!

This first post doesn’t really qualify as a true list (it’s more of a survey), but I’m gonna go with it nonetheless. It just seems appropriate right now.

THINKING OF THE WEEK THAT JUST ENDED
 
Who made you feel good this week? This will be the strangest of all answers but also very telling of my personality and current life. I had no physical contact with anyone all week long. I spoke on the phone with my sister and my mother a few times, but all of my contact with the outside world came via Twitter and text. Sad? You might think so. But I really enjoy having weeks like this. I don’t feel lonely — I mean, I “talk” to people online all day long! — and I like being able to check out for a while. During this particular week I didn’t feel wonderful as it began, so it took several days to just get myself in a state of enjoyment. My only companions have been friends via social networks and the characters on all the TV shows I watch. So, to answer the question about who made me feel good this week? Really, I didn’t feel that great at all. But I did have a couple of moments. I can’t really count that as a Win, but at least there was a bit of movement in the isolation.
 
What was the biggest mistake you made this week? I absolutely ignored some important tasks this week. They weren’t earth-shattering, but there were some things that needed to be done around my flat, and I simply ignored them. This means, of course, that I now have to plan them for next week (and even this weekend). It’s not cool, and I’m grumbly over it. But I did it to myself and I accept that responsibility. Grrrr.
 
What did you do this week that moved you closer to reaching your goals? I really only accomplished one little thing all week. No, two. Two things. I got 95% caught up with some work tasks (and had permission to put the other little things off until next week), and I created a subway style list for my summer journal. Those two things were kinda big to me.
 
Is there anything you did this week that you wish you’d done differently? I started off this week with a better sleep schedule — getting up with the same alarm no matter how early in the morning my bedtime actually came — but somewhere toward the middle of the week it all came crashing down. I slept and slept and slept through one full day without ever realizing it was happening. I wish I had that one day back, just so I wouldn’t have had the 24+ hour wakeful period that followed. It only takes one shift to change the entire rhythm. :-/
 
What did you most enjoy doing this week? What little time I spent on it, I really loved working up that subway style list. I’ll post it soon from the pages of my summer journal, but I must say that any time I get to create something from a blank canvas — be it Photoshop or scrapbook page or just a happy list — I really, really love the process. It’s creativity at its finest, just taking a blank page and watching your vision come to life. I never tire of it!
 
How did you procrastinate on important tasks this week? One huge task I ignored is my kitchen and the fresh produce that I’ve accumulated over the past couple of weeks. Every day I intended to cook up the loads of squash that my mom left for me, and every day I intended to cut into the watermelon that was given to me. But every day I put it off a little longer. Now I fear that things have spoiled, but I just didn’t make myself do it. Today is the day to deal with all of it. For sure. And I can only hope it’s not too late. [Sorry, Mom.]
 
What did you learn this week? In the midst of my feel-bads and tiredness and lack of motivation, I spent a bit of time reading through my collection of blog feeds in Google Reader and found myself inspired by interesting food combinations. I know I always proclaim a lack of cooking and a lack of desire for cooking, but this year I really do want to put these fresh foods into my life and make a habit for health. I fell off the wagon miserably after only two months (see my overly ignored Pilgrimage blog), but each new week I begin with the intention of stepping back up to the plate. [Uh, the metaphorical home plate of baseball, that is. Not the dinner plate. Or maybe it is!] But my own brain tends to get in the way of my motivation, convincing myself that cooking meals will take a long time and require much effort in my less-ventilated kitchen and will not yield that much food which will mean I have to do the entire process again in just a few days. And so I talk myself out of the entire deal and make ridiculous little bowls of food that don’t actually accumulate to a meal. But this week, while reading through a few blogs, I found a few women who take daily photos of the food they eat and the meals they create. Single women, cooking for one, and married women cooking for only two. I needed to see these meals! When I actually cook I always make recipes for families of 4. And then I eat that same dish four meals in a row. Which only contributes to my boredom and lack of desire to make anything related to food. Yet, I’m always inspired by the cooking shows on Food Network, and I’m always intrigued by the small dishes I see on these food blogs! This week, while perusing this cool little site in Japan and also poco-cocoa and even shutterbean, I had this little epiphany: food doesn’t have to be complicated. A meal can be made from pinto beans topped with chopped tomatoes and shredded cheddar cheese. Add a side of that watermelon I need to cut, and voilà! Dinner. Or lunch. And far better for me than a lot of other things I’ve been eating lately. This week I learned to stop thinking so much when it comes to “cooking.” Instead, it’s time to just take stock (sorry!) and make meals out of few ingredients. It’s time to stop trying to create, and instead just eat what’s good and available. That’s a very hard thing for me to do, and it’s probably the reason I’ve not been willing to cook all these years. I always want to create when I need to just make. I really hope this is a lesson that is now learned for good.
 
Lastly… 
 
What’s the funniest thing that happened to you this week? I don’t really experience many funny things these days since I’m, you know, alone so much, but this week actually gave me a story to tell. In fact, it happened just last night. I’m responsible for a pet this week, having to visit her home and refill food and water each evening while her family is out of town. She’s a real character, this beagle girl, and within hours of her family’s departure she found her way out of the backyard to roam the neighborhood streets. I quickly got the call to head over and put her back in, but there’s a bit of an opening in the gate that allows the dog to escape time and again. The only way to (supposedly) contain her is by shoving the garbage bins against the broken section of the gate, but this particular day was garbage pick-up, which meant the opening would be exposed most of the day. When I arrived at the house I put the beagle girl into a kennel in the garage until I could return later and move the bins in front of her escape hatch. I returned later in the evening to attend to all these puppy duties, and as I was beginning the process I mistakenly assumed that this sweet little girl would remain sweet and content into the evening. Instead, she darted from the kennel before I realized she was gone and proceeded to run full stride down the residential sidewalks. My split-second opportunity to restrain her slipped away before I even knew what had transpired. For the next 30+ minutes I drove down the streets of the neighborhood, calling out to this silly dog and attempting to corner her in one yard after another. I drove a few feet, then exited the car and tried to catch her. She escaped my grasp and ran a few more houses away, and I returned to the car and drove toward her next stopping point, where I again exited the car and attempted to catch her. I did get her once, just at the end of her street, when she was suddenly dazed by the horrific growls coming from one particular fence with a “Beware of Dog” sign posted on its planks. Beagle girl was stunned and so was I! But the fact that I was able to get my hands on her as she lay still in the grass with a terrified look in her eyes did not produce the result of getting her into the car for a trip back home. Of course not! Instead, she recovered quickly and again darted from my grasp before I could pull her off the ground. So we started our little dance again. Drive, stop, stare each other down. Run, drive, stop, stare, run some more, drive some more, stare some more. For several neighborhood blocks I prayed and called out to the blasted little beagle, all the while wondering where all the neighbors could be and why there wasn’t one single person outside to help me corner this girl! I was streets away from her home by the time we encountered a young couple in their front yard. Thankfully, they managed to coax the dog over and keep her still so I could bring the car close enough to get her inside. Of course, to this couple and their two young daughters, the beagle girl was the sweetest little thing they’d ever seen! She just lay on her back and let everyone rub her tummy as if she’d planned this whole thing. I just let her believe that, too, until I was able to scoop her stocky little body up and plop her into my front seat. If I could’ve buckled her in, I’d have done it! Our short drive back home found us both panting from the heat and the chase and the frustration and the annoyance of it all. I swear she had a look of smug satisfaction in her eyes, too, and I decided that the entire episode was meant to teach her family a lesson about leaving her alone like this. Unfortunately, it wasn’t her family who had to chase her down! :-p In the end, though, it’s hard to be angry at a beagle girl. But if it happens again, I may just have to call in reinforcements.

 

I’ve classified this list as “Journal Your Story.” It was found among 119 prompts for a journal jar at Abundance Blog.